The feel of the soft grass beneath her bare feet delighted Pearl as she danced on the lawn in the park.’  The movements of her colourful dress followed those of her small body.’  It was her fifth birthday but as far a she was concerned it was always a special day when she and her mother visited the park.’  The flowers were so colourful in her eyes and the deep shadows under the trees mysterious and exciting.’  Best of all she loved the natural pool with the fountains at the foot of the hill.’  It was large and exhilarating. Around it was a low wall and in the water were statues of nymphs laughing and dancing. From one, a stream came from its mouth, from another the water fell from an outstretched palm.
The waters and the humid air invigorated and freshened Pearl’™s senses, excited her, as if she were on a ship sailing to distant lands of which her mother spoke of so much.’  The pool was her favourite place, and she would always visit there first.
It was, therefore, to the pool and fountains that she made her way then followed by her mother’s urging voice: “Take care not to wet your new dress”.’  With this, her mother settled herself on a bench to read in the soft sun of a northern summer’s end,
Pearl, her heart beating excitedly, delighted in the sound of the water as it splashed and gurgled.’  She shrieked with delight when she noticed a rainbow that appeared in the falling spray.
A pigeon, pure white, settled on the hand of a nymph quite close to her.’  Hesitatingly it drank from the flowing water.’  In childhood innocence she avowed to it eternal friendship: ‘œWe shall always be friends,’ and the thought delighted her.
The day was one of those last days of summer, when the sun’s rays are gentle and leaves had begun to brown and fall.’ ‘  Some of these, sailing on the wind, reached the pool. There they floated like crude, ancient ships tossed by the wind and waves.
It was to such a leaf that Pearl’s attention was attracted. Quite close to the low perimeter wall it came.’  She remembered a story her mother had read to her.’  The leaf became a ship of sail travelling to a distant land. She would help it on its journey, she thought and, without hesitation, leaned forward and pushed the leaf toward the pool’™s centre.
Now the pool became for her a great sea – an ocean in storm.’  Pearl felt the thrill of the spray on her face and arms. She pushed the leaf further and, before realising it, lost her balance and fell.
To Pearl now this became an ocean indeed for Pearl could not swim and, far worse, at the point her feet did not reach the ground.’  The water froze her skin.
Instinctively she kept her head above water splashing with her arms.’  For some reason she also reached for and grasped the leaf.’  In her excitement and shock she was not able even to call out.’  Those few moments to Pearl were an eternity.
Out of nowhere, quite suddenly a large hand grabbed hold of one of her arms, another the back of her dress and with a strong haul lifted her panting, dripping and shocked out of the pool.’  The dress tore horribly. The large man set her gently on the ground.
Though the stranger began asking her questions, Pearl, without so much as even turning to the man to thank him, rushed gasping, towards her mother for comfort.
“What has happened to your lovely new dress. You’ve ruined it!” Her mother scolded her.
Her mother’™s anger stopped Pearl in alarm. She was at once confused and shocked. Her mother’™s sharp words brought about a terrible frustration within her.’ ‘  She burst into crying bitter tears. She cried as she had never cried before.
Her mother’™s anger still in her ears, Pearl vowed that she never would she tell her mother what had happened. She would tell no one. She would keep it a secret for ever.
With great sobs of relief as well as mental pain, she noticed now, for the first time, that she was still holding the leaf that she had clutched at in her fall. She felt a strange attachment to it and kept it.
Taking her daughter’s hand her mother said angrily: “Now we shall have to go home to dry and change you.”
An hour or so later a dried and much calmer little girl sat in the silence of her room and thought about the incident.’  ‘œThe pool was not to blame’, she thought.’  ‘œI was careless and fell. I shall still love the water but I also be more careful.’ Her conclusion pleased her. She truly loved the water.
The next day, Pearl and her mother were again to be seen going to the park.’  In Pearl’s hand was the leaf. As was her habit, her mother settled herself once again on her favourite bench to read, repeating to her daughter to be especially careful near the fountain.
That day Pearl was not wearing her pretty dress but a plain every-day one. She also did not approach the pool with the spontaneous joy of the day before but with caution and not a little fear.’  Arriving at the water’s edge she knelt, then sat, waiting for her racing heart to calm.
Reaching down, she placed the leaf in the water and sent it on it’s way. A puff of wind caught it and with a whirl, took hold of it and sped it through the wavelets towards the pool’s centre. Pearl watched enchanted.
Gradually her excitement returned; the excitement she always experienced at the spot.’  A white pigeon, she was sure it was her friend, settled on the hand of the nymph. How wonderful! she thought, and she wished it joy with all her heart.

Pearl, now an attractive, middle- aged woman stepped out of her car in front of the suburban cottage. It was summer and the patch of garden before the door was ablaze with colour.
“Hullo Mother,” ‘ the greeting and embrace were warm and affectionate. “Sorry, it’s been so long since I last came. I have been so very busy.”
“How are Lucy and Raymond?”
“Oh, fine. They both like school and are doing well. Mark sends his love.”
Now in her early thirties, Pearl was bright, cheerful.’  and obviously successful in the life she had chosen. Her mother excitedly prepared drinks and placed biscuits on a tray.
They had been chatting, catching up on each other’s activities only briefly, when Pearl’s eyes lit on a leaf floating in a shallow brass water filled bowl in the centre of which was a flower arrangement.’  It struck a chord in her memory. She turned to her mother, a question in her eyes, then, as if changing her mind, remained silent.
Her mother, however, noticed the expression and asked: “What do you have on your mind dear? Do tell me. Please don’™t keep it from me?”
“Mother, do you remember an incident that occurred on my fifth birthday. We were in the park. I wet and tore my new dress.’ ‘ ‘  You were awfully angry. Remember?”
“Of course I remember, my dear, as if it all happened yesterday. When I calmed I was angry and disappointed with myself for losing control.’  For years I remained unhappy about the incident and wanted to apologise but didn’t quite know how.’  Later, of course, we forget.”
Here Pearl’™s mother rose to her feet, regret accentuating the lines on her face. She turned to her daughter who now also stood.’  They held hands for a moment before embracing warmly. “I’™m so sorry,’ continued her mother, “even though it’™s so late to say so.’ She looked sadly at Pearl, whose eyes were also glistening.
‘œI want to tell you something, Mother…’
‘œNo, Pearl. Let me tell you something first,’ her mother interrupted. Something I couldn’™t really tell you before. Now you are mature, I’™m sure you’™ll understand.
You must have known how difficult it was for me, living alone, to provide for us a home and make a living then. How I longed for your father.’  Sensibly I knew he was lost’  since declared missing in the war.’  But in my heart I hoped for a miracle.’  That one day he would ring and be standing there at the door.
‘œYou were my only real reason for living, my dear.’  On your fourth birthday, seeing you in a shabby dress, I thought just how lovely it would be if for your next birthday you would have a colourful new one.’ ‘  You had so often said that you would love a new colourful dress.
I collected pennies for nearly a year for the material. How delighted we both were and how lovely you looked when you wore it. You may just imagine how upset I was when I saw it torn and wet on your birthday – the very first day you wore it. I didn’t even think to ask what happened. But how could you have understood then, you were so young. Pearl, can you – do you forgive me now?”
The pain in Pearl’™s mother’™s face was obvious; as if it had all taken place just the day before. Pearl her kerchief to her eyes, remembered the years of hopeless waiting for the father she had heard so much of yet never knew.’ ‘  There lay in her an emptiness that could never be filled. She turned to her mother.
“No, Mother, it’™s I who ask forgiveness.’ ‘  I kept a secret from you all these years. When you were angry with me that day, just when I so longed to be comforted, I was numbed. I promised myself that I would never tell you, nor anyone what had happened. It would be my secret for always.”
Pearl’s mother, her eyes, strained with concern, looked on at her daughter’s saddened face.
“I fell in the pool, Mother. My feet did not reach bottom and I was sure I would drown. I was so frightened and dazed.’  I couldn’™t even shout for help.”
Her mother, eyes, wide with disbelief and horror appeared as if the event was happening even as Pearl spoke.
“It seemed an age,” continued Pearl. “Someone – I do not know who, pulled me out by my dress and set me on my feet. I did not even thank him. I just ran. I ran for comfort. I ran to you. But you were so angry.’  I’m sorry, Mother.”
The two clasped one another close, each receiving comfort from the other’s embrace. When they had calmed they spoke spontaneously of experiences from those times.’  They shared these thoughts for several hours and it was only toward evening that Pearl rose to take her leave with many a bitter- sweet memory in her mind.
On her way home, Pearl happened to glance at the sky. It was a soft evening.’  A deep purple sky was broken here and there by whipped cream clouds. The scene reminded her of that day in the park so long ago.’  ‘œThose clouds, too, are like sailing ships on a ocean,’’  she thought to herself recalling again the leaf.’  Her heart skipped a beat when a white dove, flying in a wide ark high against a patch of clear sky caught her eye.’  A spontaneous, happy cry of delight came from her: “Perhaps you are related to my friend of long ago?’  I shall never forget.” She blessed the bird silently.’  Smiling happily, she continued on her way to family and home.